Wheelchair Access...

What do you think of my skin? And I don't mean the skin on my fucking back you cum dumpster! I chose the handicapped sign as my trademark for 3 reasons.

1. It makes me laugh when I think of people who get to sit down for their entire lives yet moan about it.
2. It's a retard symbol and is funny be default.
3. It's actually considered an official 'danger notification' symbol by the E.U and US.
   

That's right.

Which is why signs like this...

And this..

And even this...

 

All perform similar tasks in their day to day lives. And what's that kids? Yes, that's right. Warning the reader of imminent danger in that area. Now I'm no genius, (I'm also no porn star but that doesn't stop me from blasting a soggy wad on your girlfriends neck) but given the color guidelines for these public service announcements, wouldn't this symbol seem a little....controversial, in some circles of political correction obsessed retards.

To the passive viewer this may seem like nothing out of the ordinary. A simple warning to take precautions when, well, doing stuff around nearby retards. Maybe this danger sign is to let people know that they too may become retarded or confined to a slow-kart if they spend too much time in this area. Maybe they should place these outside the offices of scientologists or

weight watchers clinics to stop the accidental retardation of innocent bystanders.

Or perhaps there is something more heinous going on. Perhaps the erector of this sign has noticed some rather aggressive handicaps in the area and has taken it upon himself to warn the locals. Either way, I'd keep my fucking eyes open and my 9mm locked and loaded, cause if one of these slimey bastards tries rolling by me he's gonna get what he should have been given at birth. And that's a double tap where his faulty cerebral marshmallow has been whirring away all these years.

I could put up a whole bunch of 'funny' signs that are good for a 0.53sec laugh, but I'm not like your friends who give each other social colonic irrigations. There's more chance of me thinking that your personality resembles your mothers gash on her bloody monthly rag week, than an ego massage in the form of pat on the back or similar recognition for a photograph you copied and pasted. Go fill your photo albums with pictures of lepers and aids victims and I'll be the first one to beat off in your direction, but until then, suck my asshole till I shit on you. Speaking of sucking assholes...

That's pretty fucking awesome right? 

I guess it's obvious why priests and bono are always on long weekends over there, it's like a trip to The Dam for the cunts!